EmSaidSo

Today I looked down at my arm and saw a muscle defined in my arm. A great moment. I’ve been working out (aerobic + strength training) since the beginning of July, and last week took my first Pilates class. A muscle! under all the fat. Evidence that progress is being made.

I went to the gym yesterday. I hadn’t been in four days. My neck was cramped up from working with papers for hours on end, day after day. I did a ten minute treadmill warm-up, all of the strength training on my list, and then 30 minutes more on the treadmill. Already it has sunk into my head that when I am working out, I am not editing, or even thinking about work –this is a step in the right motivating direction: the association of working out with pleasure.

The day before, I had loaded up my iPod from my 15 year old daughters computer. I put it on “shuffle”. I was surprised to find that most of the music is heavy ‘noise music’– this is a girl who refuses to listen to any music she thinks is `sad`. She has always been very sensitive about music.

She played violin for five years and was composing her own pieces when she was 9. We were told she is musically gifted and should enter the conservatory…but she quit when she was 10. I am sure it was because of a disagreement in taste with her private teacher. The teacher kept assigning Romantic era music, which my daughter found `too emotional`. Daughter was very interested in Baroque, but the teacher refused to tailor the content of the lessons. She lost interest in the music, stopped practicing and then asked to quit. So I bought her a red electric guitar. She also took up riding. She is a passionate dressage rider. Much better than playing the violin! Anyway, the music is odd for her, someone who is always turning down the music in the car. When I got home I siphoned off the pop for my own collection.

My shoulders are starting to emerge from the sea of fat. They seem straighter and more muscled.

I’m testing out the hand coding option. This is my cat, Sassy. She was helping me work today, and channeling my feelings about this particular text.

Today is a good illustration of how I have gained so much weight. I have a ton of work to do this month, I do most of my work at home. I edit for hours and hours on end, breaking for food and drink. I vowed to my husband that I would go and work out at the club today, but let a hundred little things get in my way. Now it is night and dinner time, Ffffffffft. This is why I need a blog like this. I have to catch myself in the act and change my behavior

I’m pleased with this place, this Sweat365. It seems like a great idea. I have been looking for an online home for my fitness quest. The closest I had come to something inspiring was bodybuilding.com, but they are a bit hard core for the likes of me. Another thing that is nice about Sweat365 is that it seems to be from the Pacific Northwest, as am I, even though I live far away now. Hopefully there are other people from the region and I will be able to fit in, culturally. It is nice just to see the word “chinook” written…

I am just about to head to the gym. My husband signed us all up two months ago. He is a wonderful person. My best friend. He wanted to lift weights and do cardio– he’s six one with an athletic build. Our daughter wanted to gain muscle for dressage riding (she has a PSG Trakehner stallion). She’s five nine and 18% fat..and I…well, I think this was my husband’s polite way of encouraging me to lose weight and get fit. He is too kind to ever say anything, and always tells me I am beautiful at any weight– but let’s face it, I’ve put on 50 pounds since we married…

I take meds that make me pretty spacey. I am able to focus on my work, thank God, but when it comes to being aware of my body, ftttttt. I’ve been trying to lose weight/get fit forever and it is clear thaht I can not do it alone, as much as I insist I can. I just lose my concentration. I am very forgetful– I know this sounds ridiculous, but I *forget* I am on a diet. It is just the med-induced brain fog that keeps me from holding a thought in my head for more than a few days.

So the gym is an excellent approach. It is a gorgeous place, with over 60 cardio machines and then weight machines, indoor and outdoor pools, sauna, steam room. I enjoy working out, the old inner jock is stimulated and raises her head. I have noticed a great deal of firming-up in the two months since I started. I haven’t been watching my food as things are crazy at work and the kid is on vacation– so I am concentrating on building muscle and will start cutting out the crap when things calm down at work and she is back in school.

I’ll have to figure out how to put graphs in my sidebar to track my progress. I am so happy to have found this place.